Back in late June, I decided to be "the fun mom" and carry my girl via piggy-back. She soon decided to kick that fun up a thousand notches and drop her legs from around my waist, thus holding on with only her hands. Her hands happened to be around my neck and once she realized that was a really bad plan for her safety, she held on even more tightly and it took a great deal of effort to pry her arms off of my throat. Immediately I thought, oh yeah, that hurts, but I'll be fine tomorrow.
Well, that was over four weeks ago and I'm still not able to talk. And the "pain in the neck" is still there, which affects my eating and sleeping and what position I sit in while watching TV.
I went to my doctor and she proclaimed that everything was functioning (swallowing, breathing) and nothing was broken, but I'd need to keep whispering while my voice box healed.
Next stop was to the ENT (ear, nose, and throat doctor) where I had the joy of getting a scope sent down the nose. I knew what was coming, so I'd spent a good two weeks dreading that experience. Fortunately, they numbed my airway (brought on by some snorting on my part) so I didn't feel much of the scope. Unfortunately, they numbed my airway, which felt a lot like suffocation with a side dish of Bad Taste in the Mouth. My ENT took a close look at my vocal cords, all while I got to "heee" and "hum" and contort my face into awkward positions. I should also mention there was a mirror right in front of me, so I had to spend the whole appointment averting my eyes. Really, whose idea was that? Anyway, my doctor saw from the scope that one part of my vocal cord area is pulled from the side. She said that could be normal for my voice box, or it could be from the injury. I now have to get a CT scan of my neck so they can look more closely at that issue. That's happening a week from now.
In the meantime, I've been whispering when it's necessary to talk, and writing notes when whispering can't work. Yeah, that's not odd at all at the bank / grocery store / library / pizza store / gas station / community center! For those who thought I was anti-social before--well, I'm reaching new heights of introversion now. It's impossible for me to talk on the phone, and socializing is pretty much out of the question. You'd think I'd be overjoyed, but really, solitary confinement has its downside. Thank the heavens above for Facebook and e-mail!
The kids are "ecstatic" that Mom can't talk. After all, they're not getting nagged and yelled at every ten minutes. However, it's amazing what can be accomplished with simply A LOOK. I am honing my non-verbal communication skills, FOR SURE. And we're all learning to walk up to one another when we need to "talk." Who knew we had it in us?!
My voice works, but barely. I have to speak very quietly, and about one minute of Real Speech earns me an hour of additional swelling and pain. So! Not talking. I have no doubt (and my ENT agrees) that I'll need to see a vocal coach to ease me back to normalcy. See what I get for trying to have fun?
I have no guess as to when I'll be back to normal, but as you can see from the title of this post, I have my hopes set on talking LIKE A NORMAL PERSON before August is done. So, there you have it. This is hereby been named, "The Summer I Couldn't Talk."
